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partscounterman

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Jan 6, 2018
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9
Location
Cortez, Colorado
Yesterday Dennis and I had to stop in at Hilo Hatties to get some of the coconut shell buttons that are missing from some of our Aloha shirts. Hilo Hatties 'gimmick' is that they greet every customer with a cheap little shell lei. This time I noticed when we got in the truck to go home that the shell lei now has a small plastic tag warning that this may be a chocking hazard to children under three. WELL DUH! Is the general public so stoopid that they have to put a warning tag on every stinking thing on earth? Are modern parent so devoid of common sense? I think they should just put birth control in the water supply and only allow those that have some slight sparkle of intelligence to reproduce.

I'm done ranting-I feel better now.

Just like the coffee cups at McDonalds that say "Contents may be hot" Really?!?!?!? Coffee is ......HOT?????

Or like the stupid woman who went swimming in the ocean here and was nibbled on by a shark. Instead of falling on her knees and thanking Jah that she was still alive, she tried to sue Maui county for not posting signs on the beach that there may be sharks in the ocean. Again-what a concept! Sharks live in the ocean? No one told me that(sarcastic tone here)

Ooops-guess I wasn't done ranting after all!
 
Warning!

This forum may be hazardous to your mental well being! You will be alright David! ( If you just read the instructions)
 
Shakespeare said:

"First, let's kill all the lawyers."

It might not be a bad idea. It isn't that the general public is particularly stupid, they've just become overly litigation minded...it's easier than the lottery.

Such warnings are CYA manouvers.

Except with McD's coffee. They do serve it nearly boiling- around 180F. When I still drank coffee, 160F was quite hot enough.

Lawrence/Maytagbear
 
OMG

you KNOW there had to be a gerbil in there somewhere.

LOL ROLF LMAO

Darwin Awards: Urban Legends

Urban Legends: Darwin Awards are TRUE stories, but Urban Legends are included here by popular request. Apocryphal stories (JATO, Dog and Jeep, Raccoon Rocket) are examples of Herculean Darwinian efforts. Be glad, be very glad, these people don't exist!
www.darwinawards.com www.darwinawards.com
 
Warnings

"WELL DUH! Is the general public so stoopid that they have to put a warning tag on every stinking thing on earth?"

Yes

"Are modern parents so devoid of common sense?"

Yes

"I think they should just put birth control in the water supply and only allow those that have some slight sparkle of intelligence to reproduce."

I'll go along with that, take the stupid people out of the gene pool."
 
Qupte: they've just become overly litigation minded...it's easier than the lottery.

AND IIRC- the money is tax-free! (or so says my cousin)

In my office an ambulance-chasing attorney rents space.
On one of the huge file folders plainly visible on the floor is my cousin's wife's ethnic "new" last name that is eleven letters long. She also spells her first name "SOFIA" rather than "SOPHIA" Small world eh? My cousin is in the next county and within the city limits of NYC. I am not.
 
Morons at the Marriott

I was in a Marriott Hotel over the weekend, and was staring off into space (as I usually do), when I noticed a sign below the fire sprinkler, which was mounted high up on the wall.

It was a picture of a hanger with a circle/slash through it - the message being you shouldn't hang your clothes on a fire sprinkler.

So our options are this:

1.) There is a thriving industry out there which looks out for potential problems and creates snappy signage for it (plausible)

2.) Some moronic Marriott Guest, at one time or another, chose to hang some clothes on the fire sprinker, and knocked the head off of it. (probable)

Having been through an accidental discharge of a fire sprinkler (which is not a pleasent experience - that water comes out at high pressure, and has been sitting in the pipe for a while - everything ends up a stinky, sodden mess) I hope it was #2. I can just imagine the outraged guest screaming at the hotel about how NOBODY TOLD THEM not to hang a hanger off a sprinkler. :-)
 
I think my favorite has to be the "HOT" label on the McDonalds coffee. You would think one would put two and two together...

Not hanging your clothes on a fire sprinkler is also a good idea for "the masses"...LOL!
 
But, alas, you can't beat the line that's in every troubleshooting guide in every instruction manual...

"Machine not working

a - Is the machine plugged in?
b - Has the Power button been pressed?"

LOL - how stupid can you get???

What I also think is kinda stupid is the new Securicor vans they have here - when they reverse, they literally have a computer voice saying "Warning, Vehicle Reversing! Warning, Vehicle Reversing!" No s**t sherlock!!!

Oh, probably been mentioned oddles of times before... but I still have to laugh when I look on a packet of KP peanuts and there's a warning label saying "Warning - product contains traces of nuts!" I bloody well hope the packets contain traces of nuts!! LOL

Jon
 
"Do not use while bathing." Definitely seen this on hair dryers, not sure if it's in any toaster instructions...

Oooh. Oooh. Other favorite hair dryer instruction: "Do not use while sleeping."

veg, who rarely uses any appliances while sleeping
 

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