Dumb joke thread

[jasonl]

stuck in the wrong place

Boudreaux went to the doctor one day and said, "Doc, I can't hear nuttin' out ma right ear."

The doc looked in his ear and said, "Boudreaux, I found the problem. You have a suppository in your ear."

Boudreaux says, "OH! Well, now I know where I put my hearing aid!"

 

[favorit]

Toggles explain me ...

maybe i'm a bit dumb

i can't get the irony about the 2 polish men and the polish woman on the tropical island
Why do they swim away ?? What's wrong with polish women (or with polish men) ??

Update about 2 italian men + 1 woman :

The two italian men run into a TV set, start watching soccer matches while the woman reaches the french team .....

 

[toggleswitch2]

Do it Greek Style!

With nothing better to say, I guess they are trying to say the Polish woman is unattractive either in body, spirit or character! LOL

My aunt was half Polish and half Greek. Her mother (Polish) was absolutely beautiful and she was the clasiest women I have ever met. Out of love and repsect for her husband she learned Greek (IN AMERCIA!). She alway spoke to me in Greek, and I had no idea she was Polish until my mid-20's.

Even though born in America, I didn't speak English until about a year before school. My nieces were reared...er raised.... the same way.

 

[westingman123]

Hey Toggles!

Here in Missouri we rear children and raise crops! Perhaps you're a southerner at heart there in the big apple...LOL

 

[toggleswitch2]

Of course, because southerners have wonderful hearts!

 

[polkanut]

Toggles,

I grew up speaking Low German and English until I started kindergarten, but now most of the Low German I knew has been forgotten. I wish I remembered more because it is such a beautiful language, and it is almost extinct here in America. It is still spoken in parts of rural Northern Germany.

 

[toggleswitch2]

Truly bilngual people, I think have an advantage. Aids in flexibility of thinking.

A former roomate was in a high-falutin' French program and was struggling. Me, with much less of an education in French was able to grasp the more idiomatic expressions and express them to him in English.

Languages learned young are in different regions of the brain than languages learned later, IIRC. I had an uncle in America for 50 years. (Came at 20-ish). A stroke wiped-out his English completely. He remembered only Greek. THAT was fun with the nursing home staff! He THOUGHT he was speaking English and was getting frustrated!

Still, nothing beats holiday dinners when the older folks had weak English and the kids found English much easier. You'd be switching back and forth so many times you didn't know which end was up. Best is when all three generations were using two languages in one sentence. Some things are just easier in "that" language, and some are easier in "this" one.

Italian grocer in Greek ghetto (neighborhood) learned math in Greek. Apperently he'd say the total in English. Customers would stare blankley and then check-out the display on the cash register. At the same time she'd say it in Greek, then dig for her money to pay. After 50 times a day, I guess he learned numbers and money in Greek LOL

Another story. Worked with a Morrocan Jew who spoke Hebrew, Arabic, French and English. He kept repeating this phrase once a day for YEARS. I finally learned it and pronouced it (he says) to perfection. I finally asked what it meant. The day of his retirement he told me. Well, let's just say I cant repeat that one EVER! LOL (it's a tad anti-semitic!) *OY VEY*

 

[favorit]

thanks

however average Polish women and other east european women are usually beautiful.

Find odd an italian immigrant living in a greek neighborhood,
our emigrants have been said to live on their own in a parallele world (like Chinese do here)
Maybe the grocer came from those places in southern italy where Grekanika [link] is a minority language ?

"Ghetto" in italian means "Jewish quarter" and brings memory back to dark ages

Loading…

en.wikipedia.org

 

[favorit]

Plattdeutsch - Low German

Polkanut,
to freshen it up there's also Plattdeutsch Wikipedia.
I believe that the more we go global, the more we've to preserve our own cultures as treasures

Loading…

nds.wikipedia.org

 

[jasonl]

Parlez vous Cajun?

My whole family spoke (Cajun/Acadian) French before they learned English. My generation and beyond learned English and a little bit of French to know when the old folks were talking about us.

 

[revvinkevin]

You remember the "infamous" Yugo.... don't you?

Q: How do you double the value of a Yugo?
A: Fill the gas tank.

Q: What do you call a Yugo that breaks down after 100 miles?
A: An overachiever.

Q: What comes in every Yugo owners manual?
A: A bus schedule!

 

[revvinkevin]

Forgot to add this....... LOL

 

[jasonl]

FIAT = Fix it again, Tony

FORD = Fixed or repaired daily, Found on road dead, DROF = Driver returning on foot

GMC = Got a mechanic coming

PONTIAC = (censored)

 

[58limited]

FORD = First On Race Day

 

[58limited]

GTO = Get the Tools Out

 

[ptcruiser51]

DeSoto=Dead Explorer Symbol On The Ornament

 

[mixfinder]

Golden Humor

During one of her daily classes, a teacher trying to
teach good manners asked her students the following question:
"Michael,if you were on a date having dinner with a nice young lady,how would you tell her that you have to go to the bathroom?'
Michael said, 'Just a minute I have to go pee.'The teacher responded by saying, 'That would be rude
and impolite.

What about you Sherman, how would you say it?'
Sherman said, 'I am sorry, but I really need to go
to the bathroom. I'll be right back.'
'That's better, but it's still not very nice to say the word bathroom at the dinner table.

And you, little Johnny, can you use your brain for once and
show us your good manners?'
'I would say: ! Darling , may I please be excused
for a moment? I have to shake hands with a very dear
friend of mine, whom I hope to introduce you to after dinner.'

 

[iheartmaytag]

For St. Patrick;s Day a Irish Fable

An Irishman walks out of a bar. . .