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spiralactivator

Well-known member
Joined
Sep 7, 2004
Messages
344
Pardon me if this is totally inappropriate or depressing to anyone. My mother spend the past eight or so months in a hard battle with terminal cancer. Last night she died. Even when you know these things are coming, you can never truly prepare for them. I'm still kind of dazed. Time seems all screwy. I spend a lot of time thrashing around, smoking cigarettes and drinking Dial-a-Brew coffee and trying not to think too much. I apologize if this message isn't totally coherent.
 
I am so sorry about your mom. You are right. Even though you know that death is inevitable, it is still such a difficult time.

Your mom is in a better place where there is peace and no more pain. Please take comfort in knowing that.

God bless you and your family -

Venus
 
Oh, wow-

I am so sorry about your Mother's death.

Treat yourself gently, and try not to freak out if things don't make sense for a couple of weeks or months.

I think this is a perfectly appropriate place to announce milestones in our lives.

Prayers and love,

Lawrence/Maytagbear
 
My Dear Spiral,

I'm so very sorry to hear of your mother's passing. I have worked in the death care profession for years, but yet still don't understand it. My heartfelt sympathy goes out to you and yours. Get a grip on yourself, for now it's time to take care of things as your mother would have wanted. All the best to you, and God Bless. God WILL make a way and give you the strength to get through this. Mark (Lightedcontrols)
 
My thougts are with you

Dear Spiral,
I lost my mom the end of October last year after a 7 year battle with alzehimers. Diseases that slowy destroy people never really prepare you for the end. I has wished for my mom to go to sleep and not wake up because her quality of life was gone years before. Even knowing she would be better off, I still cried as if it were a sudden event. Even after almost 6 months I still cry for her. In a way when I do I believe it's her way of telling me she's ok. There were some tender and intersting things that happend the week she died and maybe someday I'll get to tell you about them. Just know a lot of people care. Even people you don't know.

Joe
jamman_98
 
I'm so sorry to hear about your mom. Everyone handles their grief in their own way, or should, so please don't feel apologetic for wanting to let it out. It's a life changing moment I think more for sons than daughters in a lot of cases.
 
Dear Spiral,
I too am very sorry to learn of your mothers passing. Do take comfort in knowing that her spirit will always live on,and one day you shall meet her again.
Both my parents died from long battles with cancer. I know how difficult it must have been for you to watch for the last eight months. Wish we could all hug you now. May the love of countless fond memories bring you peace at this time.

Rick Reader
 
Dear Spiral,

I lost one of my best friends to cancer in 2000, after a 4 year battle. It was tough then and I still miss him today. You are right, no matter how much you think you are prepared, you're never quite there when it does happen.
Take comfort that your mom has gone home, she's at peace. No more drugs, no more pain, no more suffering, no more fighting.
For you, keep yourself busy, go easy on the coffee and cigarettes, and enjoy your family.
We're all here if you need us to.
My thoughts and prayers go with you.
Peace to you
Jeff
 
Dear Spiral

I am sooo sory you have lost your mom, and you're in your early 20s. My heart & prayers go out to you and will keep praying for yoyu and your family. I know the fact she's at peace and not suffering right now doesnt help or dull the pain of the loss. Grieve and don't keep it bottled in.

And yes, it was most appropriate you posted. Many members have shared their triumphs and saddness & tragedies with us through the years. We are a family and we do care and love each other. Bob
 
Caring thoughts being sent to you from Texas spiralativator.

Just know that there are a whole lot of folks out here, who you have never met, never spoken to, but who think of you and everyone here as one big family.

My prayers are with you for peace, and hopefully soon, loving and more happy thoughts of your mom, when days were better for the both of you. It will happen. Keep her memory alive inside of you, and they will never truly pass away.

I lost my mom to that awful dreadful disease 15 yrs ago this September. I still think and speak of her or TO her everyday.

Rest assured, she is no longer in pain, and is truely in a much better place.

Blessings to you in the time of sorrow,
Carol
 
Just to add to what was said above, take comfort that a lot of your "family" here are here for you, and understand the horrific loss you are feeling at this time.

Scott
 
I don't think there are any words that anyone can offer that will make you feel better. No matter how old we are or how long we have our parents, we are never ready to give them up. I can only tell you that you have my thoughts and prayers so that you will find peace and comfort someday. You will grieve your own way and in your own time. And there really will come a day when you think of your mother and the memories will make you smile more than they will make you sad. While nothing is ever the same again, you find a way to go on and keep her alive in your heart. That way she will live as long as you do. And I truly believe she is watching over you in some way.

You know, Sunday will be 5 years that my mother died after a brief and unexpected illness. There are times I still can't believe she is gone and there are times it hurts like it did when it first happened. But I try to remember something she told me once when I was having a very bad day after breaking up with my partner of 14 years. She simply said "It's OK, you know....there are just some things in your life you never get over. You learn to work around them and move on - but they never really go away. And when you least expect it you fall into a pothole......."
 
Cherish the memories. I look at my own parents and know that I, too, will be going through this soon. I hope the comfort you get from family and friends will get you through this tough time.

Ron
 
Spiral--
Like the others, I'm sorry for your loss. No matter how well you see it coming, it's never easy to take.

Please be comforted by the fact that so many people care about you.

veg
 
Re: Our Dear Club Friend:

Please spiralactivator, know that as with everyone else, that I'm here for you and we all are, in Spirit and Prayer in our own way. What you wrote is certainly understandable for what your going through at this time. I know as well what it is to loose a Parent, I've lost both of mine in May 1993 and June 1995, besides a many know my Life-Partner on January 1999. It still hurts, I get quite lonely lots of times, but I'm also doing kind of a Volunteer program of being a Facilitator of a Group and I'm also at this time going through a Bereavement Class, sponsered through a Local Medical Facility Hospice Program, which is a Free Class, that meets every Wednesday for 6-Weeks.

Peace be with you and your Families, comforting Thoughts, Prayers, Love of Friendship and Hugs, Steve
SactoTeddyBear...
 
My Deepest Sympathy

Spiral,

I am so sorry and saddened by your loss. It is so sad to loose anyone, especially your parents(my Mom in 1988 and my Dad in 1989). Somehow, you know it is coming, but truly are never actually prepared for the final moment. My comforting thoughts are with you at this time of mourning.

Gary
 
Spiral, I am very sorry for your loss! As has been mentioned no matter how ready we think we are for this when it really does happen it hits us full on! I have lost both parents and do know what you are going through. One thing that you can be thankful for now is this wonderful group. I wish that I would have had this when I was going through this difficult time. Just know that you are in my thoughts and prayers and know that we are here for you. Terry
 
I'm very sorry to hear your about your loss. No matter how it happens it is never easy.

Please take care of yourself during this difficult time.
 
Spiral Activator

Same as above.
You never can prepare, I've almost lost my mother six times this last decade and am grateful that she's still with me. I suppose we never are really ready.
Take care and keep in touch.
 
Heartfelt Sympathy

Dear Spiralactivator,

I'm so very, very sorry to hear about the loss of your mother.

Please take care of yourself.

Cherish the memories.

My thoughts and prayers are with you and yours at this difficult time.

Mike
 
My deepest condolences

Spiralactivator,

I'm sorry for your lost and I know how it feels to lose someone to an long term illness, but I can testify that the grieving process will be quick. The key is to talk about good times as well as the bad. If you have siblings, this is the time to get together and really pick up the pieces. Make all decision as a team and not as an individual. I just hope that all of mom paperwork was done so you and your family will lose to the state!

As for you, start living. Long term illness can weigh you down and when you realized that the burden has been lifted you will know what I mean........, for I lost my dad back in January two days before my birthday.

Take a deep breath, cry a little and reflect on the life she lived and spent with you, my mom spirit stayed with me up to 6 month after her death back in 1998 but she gave me the ultimate Christmas gift and she told me that night you saw your bedroom door waving, (It took me forever to understand what was the meaning of that door waving until she explained it to me) I was telling you I'm saying goodbye and from that day my heart has been filled with joy because I had a mom who not only loved me in the flesh, but also in the spirit.

I will say a prayer for you and your family, healing will come in time and it is not to be rushed!
Just remember these words, this too shall pass!
 

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