Question for those on here who are gay

[nmaineman36]

To add to what I had posted...fast forward 24 years...my mom has been very accepting. Even though I do get the occasional "well so much for grandkids" I usually tell her she can go out and have them if she wanted to. I now tell her that my cats are her grandkids and they give much less grief. She has been really supportive of my relationship with Scott. She will call and she will chat with him and he calls her mom. And on top of that my mom is a holy roller..almost Super Catholic. Scary but true.
Parents can be funny sometimes and when you think it will go one way it can go in the other direction. My mother in law and my mom got to know each other and they used to chat more than we realized. Scott's mom passed away last year and it was a rough time going thru the Alzheimers and watching a vibrant woman fade away. I got to spend some time with her and she told me that I was the best thing that happened to her son...and he had some losers in his life.
I will have to agree with what Vern said...there are label queens out there and I was involved with one for 6 long long years. If it wasnt Burberry or a Louie V he wouldnt wear it or he wouldnt bother with someone if they made less money than him. Shallow oh man yeah and no good in bed either...I had a better time by myself but thats another whole story there.

And about the bitter queens out there that dont know how to keep a man yet somehow know how to give advise to people and that love to see others in misery. Those Queens that have a vicious mouth yet run for the hills when they are confronted...you dont need them in your life and you will figure out who they are fast. I just weed those queens out of my life. I dont have time for negative people in my life.
Oh to be 25 again and know what I know now. And one other thing as Miss RuPaul says " How can you love someone when you dont love yourself." And I would have to add to that and accept who you are because you can try to hide from it but it will always be there. Something to think about.

 

[panthera]

Lou,

Sorry, I think you misunderstood me. I said "christianists" not Christians.

 

[richm]

Best to you

Bruce,

Congratulations on taking the first steps to figuring out who you are....there is nothing you should be ashamed of. I finally came out as a gay man 4 years ago after being married over 25 years. It was something I couldn't face when I was younger but wish I could have. Please know that there is nothing wrong with you.

Today I am coaching men and women who have come to the place that you have in their lives. Please feel free to write backchannel if you'd like to chat.

RichM

[email protected]

 

[whitekingd]

Toggleswitch2

Thank you for sharing that poem from the high school student. How very touching, sad, and beautiful all at the same time. Thank you much!

 

[toggleswitch2]

 

[whirlpolf]

which reminds me of..

hey Bruce,
here is something I found on the web some years ago. If you want THIS (see pic), then go for it. Trust your heart.
Good luck!
Joe

 

[panthera]

Ein Wahres Wort

Hey Joe - there is a lot of truth in that picture.

Whenever someone asks me why I "feel" I "have" to marry my love, many of those images portrayed in those verses come to my mind.

Thanks!

 

[tlee618]

Joe, that was beautiful thanks for sharing it!! For those who have been lucky enough to find someone like this, they are truly blessed!!

 

[variomatic]

I think I know how you must be feeling, Bruce..
I´m 17 and I´m not a 100% sure that I´m gay, but I thought about having sex with men since I´m 14 years old. I quite like thinking about it and i don´t even feel sick when I do. I´m nearly sure that I´m gay and I also don´t care - at leats most of time. I just think about it sometimes when my friends disappoint me.
When I think back in my past, I must have been gay since day one. I prefered playing with BabyBorn and my favourite color was purple. I even had purple shoes.
At the moment, I don´t think about coming out because I like my life as it is and I don´t want to lose it. Well, I already did lose it some months ago when I was told my mum´s suffering on breast cancer - but she´s fine again and my life became normal in the last 2 months.
At the monet, I don´t have the guts to tell anyone. I don´t want to tell it to my parents because I´m afraid of diasspointing them and i don´t want to tell it to my friends either. Most of my friends are female but I come along with the boys as well. It´s not easy for me to come along with the boys.
It´s not that they´re mocking me or something like that. No, I´m just afraid of being alone with them...I don´t want to come out to my friends, because they find gays disgusting and when we´re watching films like "Brokeback Mountain" they´re screaming every 5 minutes. Annonying.
My fear is, that they won´t come along with me any longer if I tell them.
Well, as i already told, I don´t care that I´m gay and it isn´t a real problem that i didn´t come out yet. I live my life and when the time has come, I will tell them.
I´m still a virgin and I never had a girlfriend either. I don´t even want to try a girl. I would like to have a secret boyfriend and nobody would know. But it would also be enough to just try it. My sister is asking me all the time If I´m having a girlfriend and this afternoon, she even asked me if a female friend (my sister think it´d be my girlfriend ) of mine is going to sleep at our house at Saturday. Everybody thinks I´m in love with her and everbody is asking me about that. But that makes me sure that I´m behaving straight.
I have no clue about how my parents would react when I´d tell them that I´m gay. I think my father would accept it and I hope my mother learned to accept other peoples and their sexual orientation when she suffered on cancer. I think she got an other oppinion about people who are different.

 

[toggleswitch2]

In today's world young perople are more open to both sides of the fence and more experimentation. Who says you have to choose?

I'd say even if you are caught in bed with someone of an unexpected gender say "it was my first time"!

I'm not saying it's right but so many bi-s get married, and do what they have to do on "boys' night out". Of course less tragic if wifey is bi or gay and knows hubby is too.

I say look at it this way- one or ten experiences does not a person make. I'd say do what you have to do quietly and no one needs to see a tattoo on your forehead. That does not mean don't be proud of who G-d made you, and don't not rejoice in the perfection of who you are right this minute. All I'm saying is silence is golden, sometimes.

Most important is practice safer sex, never ever let booze be an excuse to do risky things, treat yoruself and your body with dignity, and you are sleeping with EVERYONE your partners have. THINK AND BE CHOOSEY!

Never ever ever believe "I cant get "it" because I'm not gay-"- this is THE BIGGEST lie married closet gay/bi men tell themselves as they do the riskiest things imaginable.

LOVE YOUSRSELf AND RESPECT YOURSELF.
Enjoy your youth and take LOTS of pictures---when you get to be 40-ish *LOL* the trolldom comes upon you quickly!

One word of advice livign the gay life means not living the "straight and narrow: life you have MANY more options. Choose wisely and remember this awful saying:

"No one loves you when you are old and g(r)ay."Have fun now but know it all calms down and think of your future too! Don't "Marry" too soon or too late!

Too much said.

PEACE!

 

[toggleswitch2]

More preaching

Lovers come and go. Friends are forever. I'd say be friends with your lover before during and after your relationship.

MAKE FIRENDS AT YOUR AGE AND KEEP THEM. VERY LTTLE IS DEARER. REMEBER FAMILY MAY TURN ON YOU AT ANY GIVEN TIME. This is not a lifesyte for sissies, and it's certainly not a choice. [and if any stright out there thinks it is I want you to be exlsively gay for 6 months, and tell me how it goes!]. You have to be VERY strong to survice. But it choses us, we don't choose it.

Don't punish anyone when a relationsship ends because they could not meet your emotional needs, mental needs or physical needs. That is not fair or reasonable. No one else can make YOU happy in life that is YOUR job.

OK who the F--- hit the "preach" button? *LOL*

 

[bobbyderegis]

Toggles:
You'd be smashing in a cassock and gown!
Bobby in Boston

 

[animasinsulinpu]

Pic

And we need pics of that Toggle Man.....Bill in Az.....

 

[toggleswitch2]

Like this Bobby? *LOL*

 

[mayguy]

Bruce,

Any update for us, or anything to say about what we've shared with you?