Why didn't he just say, "Well, it's ORANGE in COLOR!"

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maggie~hamilton

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We have some friends from Germany visiting us. We took them to "IHOP" (International House of Pancakes) for breakfast.

On the menu is the offering "Pure Squeezed Orange Juice." Now, what the heck is "pure squeezed?"

I asked the server, "Is the orange juice fresh squeezed?" The reply: "It TASTES like fresh-squeezed."

We passed.

"PURE SQUEEZED."

As opposed to "IMPURE SQUEEZED," one assumes.

Whatever marketing genius came up with the term "pure squeezed" is surely a multi-billionaire by now. Maybe it was the same brainchild who devised "Genuine Woodgrain Formica." It's the same mindset, at any rate.

The only term missing was that other warm/fuzzy, feel-good NON-description, "Farm Fresh."

Truth in advertising? Well, yes, it's truthful enough. But it's also more than a little bit misleading. I wonder how many people's eyes gloss over "Pure Squeezed" and interpret it as "Fresh Squeezed" and don't bother to ask?

And, indeed, how many people can even TELL that it's not "Fresh Squeezed?" Well, I sure can, when I can walk right outside my door and get all the "FRESH SQUEEZED" I want.

Why make a big deal out of this, surely some would ask. Why? Because it's such a crystal clear example of the way the entire advertising industry is based on deceptive descriptions, misleading terms, and, indeed, outright lies in many cases. (Clue: "Farm fresh" ISN'T.)

Aren't you just a little sick of it? I am.

~
CRL
 
Well I take most of it with a grain of salt. The one thing that really annoys me is when they advertise that if you buy something you get something free.. Like buy a mattress and get a free 20" TV.. Well it's not free.
Or buy one get one free?
Neither are free, they're a bonus. What happened to calling them a bonus?

The other tricky line in many ads is:

Nothing (outcleans,outperforms,works better than, etc) our product...
Example. No other detergent cleans better than Tide.
All that is saying is that the other detergents could clean or may clean as well as Tide, they just don't clean any better than tide.
 
When I worked for Four Seaons and Westin I used to develop menus and menu descriptions for Catering menus. It was a hoot! and it usually had very little to do with what we were actually serving.

But at least we were tasteful about it. When I worked for ITT Sheraton (before the split-up) we were doing these tacky "Oscar Meyer" breakfasts.
 
Menu Selections

When I lived in the Tidewater region of Virginia, my family frequently went to a little roadside restaurant called HORNES. It's located outside of Richmond, on the way to or from Newport News where my grandparents and Aunt Dabney lived.

One of the menu items was "CREAMY COLE SLAW" and for some reason that just tickled my brother Noel to no end, especially when Daddy, chuckling and with a twinkle in his eye, added "a side dish of CREAMY COLE SLAW" to his meal. Ever since then, it's been a running family joke - e.g., I'll call Noel and ask what he's having for dinner and he'll say "RoseAnn [wife] is making CREAMY COLE SLAW."

When you think about it, it IS pretty ridiculous!

 
I loathe marketing and *fluff*

My favorite question when I was in food-service (VERY BRIEFLY)was "IS IT FRESH?"
"NO, BUT I AM" ....[displays Massengil package]. F*&K you and get out!

Can you see why I would not hack it? *LOL*
 
Whenever the subject of fresh vs. frozen comes up, I remember the episode of Fawlty Towers when Basil assures the rude American businessman that the peas in the "Waldorf Salad" are fresh. It turns out, of course, that the peas are frozen, and of course Basil gets yelled at for that.

I also recall reading somewhere that frozen concentrated orange juice was a bust - it didn't taste right, it tasted cooked - until someone discovered that by adding back a little unconcentrated juice to the concentrate before freezing, that restored the taste. The logical conclusion of all that is that you can certainly freeze unconcentrated orange juice, and it should taste pretty good when thawed. It certainly works with fresh frozen unconcentrated lime and lemon juice. It just takes up far more room in the freezer than a concentrate would.
 
Other annoying & meaningless advertising cliches

"PRICED TO SELL" ... NO?! Really! What else would things be priced for?

"AS SEEN ON TV" ... Ohhh,, wowwwwwwww! The product has been featured on some schmucky late-night infomercial. Boy, am I ever impressed! I'll take a dozen!!!

"CALL NOW! OPERATORS ARE STANDING BY!" Operators in some third-world country are "standing by" waiting with bated breath for your phone call. Um, they will be "standing by" regardless of when you call. Phony urgency.

"THIS OFFER WILL END SOON!" Right. Then they'll just start another offer of the same crap, at the same "sale" price.

"PRICES SLASHED." Only tells part of the story. Prices are first increased, then "slashed" to what they would have been in the first place.

Others that you love to hate?

oh, yeah... "pure squeezed."
 
"And if you call in the next TEN MINUTES . . ." A Consumer Reports reporter waited 20 minutes, called the toll-free number and was still offered the limited-time bonus. The explanation: "The infomercial is playing all over the country twenty-four hours a day, so just about ANY TIME is within 'the next ten minutes.' "

"CRUELTY-FREE FORMULA! NEVER tested on animals." Again, a CR reported called the toll-free numbers on a few premium priced shampoo and conditioner bottles making that claim. The conclusion every time: The stuff in the bottle wasn't tested on animals but it's made from ingredients known to be safe according to the most reliable sources.

What sources? Labs that tested the individual ingredients on animals. In other words, let someone else take the heat.
 
"What sources? Labs that tested the individual ingredients on animals. In other words, let someone else take the heat."

Ingredients may fall under the classification "Generally Recognized as Safe", or GRAS. GRAS substances may have been around for so long that they were never tested at all. IIRC, a number of food colorings used to be considered GRAS because they were related to classic German aniline dye development in the late 1800's. Never had to be tested at all. Some of these came under renewed scrutiny in the 1970's, like FDC Red no. 2, because they caused mutations in bacteria grown in petri dishes ("mutagenic"). Maraschino cherries used to be loaded with the stuff. Red no. 2 wound up being pulled from the GRAS list; a supposedly safer tested (perhaps on animals) substitute Red no. 40 is used instead.

Cruelty-free? How many of our everyday products have ingredients in some way resulting in a loss of habitat or environment for animals? Virtually everything.
 
The biggest lie of all...

"NEW AND IMPROVED" -- means the price went up, the size got smaller and the more expensive ingredient was removed. One of those three is in play 100% of the time that phrase is use.
 
another one for the list

...or how about the 2008 XXXX, "nicely equipped for $25,499"--is there ever a car that isn't nicely equipped?

Or "Genuine Chevrolet" as opposed to "Imitation Chevrolet"?

Or "Visit the friendly Dodge dealer near you" (as if Dodge would allow UNfriendly dealers?)

LMFAO, man!
 
The biggest lie of all...
"NEW AND IMPROVED" --

Keeps company with these classics:
a) The check is in the mail.
b) I wont - - - in your mouth.
c) I will love you forever.
d) Yours is the biggest one I've ever seen!
e) Wife: No I'm not a virgin but you are the SECOND man I ever slept with.
 
It's not just advertising

What about newscasters? Everything is so sensational. The 5.6 quake we had here last month had all of them scrambling for footage of damage. They milked a mild shaker for all they could and the most they could come up with was the usual grocery aisle strewn with inventory scene. Don't even get me started on the teasers for news stories that are "coming up next" when in reality they don't come up for another 20 minutes, but my intelligence continues to be insulted over that 20-minute period while they continue to advise this same story is still "coming up next." By that the time it actually does, I've long since left the room.

The most ridiculous phrase I've heard on the news is that someone or something has "turned up missing." How exactly does one accomplish that? There are others, but they are not coming to mind right now so have at it guys.
 

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