I'd show him a crime..
Had an ex who thought they could get by with shit like that. I fixed that real quick.
"Oh, Im sorry the dinner I worked all afternoon on isnt exactly as you would like it, and your mother was a better cook. It's a shame it upset you so much you feel the need to throw down your fork, slam the plate, and chew me out over it like the lowly slave you seem to see me as. Let me clear this mess off the table so you dont have to look at it."
Proceed to pick up the platter with the glazed ham, throw it past him, across the room, to hit the wall and shatter, take your arm, and sweep everything else off the table in one movement to shatter on the floor, look at him, and say..
"the table is clear, I'm going to bed and you can feed your damn self from now on."
I lost some beautiful dishes, but when I unlocked the bedroom door the next morning (Im no fool. After he got over the shock I wanted a locked door between us), the mess was already in the garbage, and the scene was never repeated.
