seeitrun2006
Well-known member
I don't draw worth a crap either. Nor am I good in math. If it was not for calculators I would not be able to fucntion in todays world.
Asperger's syndrome
- Thread starter Cybrvanr
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jasonl
New member
Making the bed
OK, without having some sexual remark from Togs (not that he does that anyway ;-)), how many of us ADD, Aspie, or OCD people are very particular about making our beds?
For me, the sheets have to be perfectly aligned and squared, and pulled up as far as possible for best coverage. The top of the bedspread must be even with the top of the sheet so it can be folded or rolled back. I thought I was anal about it until I tried to help Helen make the bed. OMG! I just stepped back and watched the most perfectionist, OCD bed-making EVER. I was in awe of such a performance. Perfectly aligned sheet and bedspread, "hospital corners", and the top part rolled back for ease of getting in and covering up. Helen's good when it comes to the bed (insert innuendo here).
OK, without having some sexual remark from Togs (not that he does that anyway ;-)), how many of us ADD, Aspie, or OCD people are very particular about making our beds?
For me, the sheets have to be perfectly aligned and squared, and pulled up as far as possible for best coverage. The top of the bedspread must be even with the top of the sheet so it can be folded or rolled back. I thought I was anal about it until I tried to help Helen make the bed. OMG! I just stepped back and watched the most perfectionist, OCD bed-making EVER. I was in awe of such a performance. Perfectly aligned sheet and bedspread, "hospital corners", and the top part rolled back for ease of getting in and covering up. Helen's good when it comes to the bed (insert innuendo here).
seeitrun2006
Well-known member
The bed
Believe it or not we never make our bed except on Saturday and Sunday. That has never really bothered me. My is a perfecionist when it comes to making a bed also. It MUST be perfect. Pillows placed just right, comforter even on all sides etc.
When I'm in the bed YES the sheets have to be completely smooth, tucked in at the foot with at least one smooth thin blanket on top folded a back just enough as to not be touching my face. Wherever I'm sleeping it must be a room that is almost pitch black. No ticking clocks, water dripping, dogs barking etc. and bedroom temp cool. Being an Aspie I am bothered by sudden loud noises anyway but at night when a storm comes up if the lightning flashes I'm awake before the thunder booms. My wife has slept thru some of the worst storms you can imagine.
One other thing I can't stand is clutter. It just cuts thru me like A knife.
Oh well it takes all kinds!
Believe it or not we never make our bed except on Saturday and Sunday. That has never really bothered me. My is a perfecionist when it comes to making a bed also. It MUST be perfect. Pillows placed just right, comforter even on all sides etc.
When I'm in the bed YES the sheets have to be completely smooth, tucked in at the foot with at least one smooth thin blanket on top folded a back just enough as to not be touching my face. Wherever I'm sleeping it must be a room that is almost pitch black. No ticking clocks, water dripping, dogs barking etc. and bedroom temp cool. Being an Aspie I am bothered by sudden loud noises anyway but at night when a storm comes up if the lightning flashes I'm awake before the thunder booms. My wife has slept thru some of the worst storms you can imagine.
One other thing I can't stand is clutter. It just cuts thru me like A knife.
Oh well it takes all kinds!
jasonl
New member
Pitch black
No no no no no no no no no no...
HELL NO!
I know I'm going to get alot of crap for this but, there must be nightlights and either a fan blowing or a radio playing (music) for me to sleep. Darkness and dead silence will drive me absolutely nuts.
What used to scare me about thunderstorms was never the lightnight flashing or the thunder but the threat of a power outage and all the lights going off. Thank God for Taplites, candles, and generators!
When I was small, loud noises such as motorcycles, train horns, 18 wheelers, jets flying overhead used to scare me but that's all gone now. I don't remember ever being scared of thunder except for the fact that the lights will go out. The only thing that freaks me out a little is when a t-storm gets bad and looks like a tornado may be coming. But that's a normal fear, I guess.
No no no no no no no no no no...
HELL NO!
I know I'm going to get alot of crap for this but, there must be nightlights and either a fan blowing or a radio playing (music) for me to sleep. Darkness and dead silence will drive me absolutely nuts.
What used to scare me about thunderstorms was never the lightnight flashing or the thunder but the threat of a power outage and all the lights going off. Thank God for Taplites, candles, and generators!
When I was small, loud noises such as motorcycles, train horns, 18 wheelers, jets flying overhead used to scare me but that's all gone now. I don't remember ever being scared of thunder except for the fact that the lights will go out. The only thing that freaks me out a little is when a t-storm gets bad and looks like a tornado may be coming. But that's a normal fear, I guess.
jasonl
New member
Generator
My dad just bought a monster 17.5kw generator that's loud as hell. I'm sure I'd have been skeered of it as a child but would've appreciated the fact that it won't be dark in the house.
My dad just bought a monster 17.5kw generator that's loud as hell. I'm sure I'd have been skeered of it as a child but would've appreciated the fact that it won't be dark in the house.
jasonl
New member
What is a Syndrome?
According to Wikipedia...
In medicine, the term syndrome is the association of several clinically recognizable features, signs, symptoms, phenomena or characteristics which often occur together, so that the presence of one feature alerts the physician to the presence of the others. In recent decades the term has been used outside of medicine to refer to a combination of phenomena seen in association.
I always hated the word Syndrome. It seem to put us people (with a some Syndrome or another) into our own classification, with a connotation of "inferiority", as if to say we're not normal. At least using words like "Moebian" and "Aspie" kinda takes the Syndrome part of it away, giving us more of a exclusive kind of status, like a certain uniqueness.
According to Wikipedia...
In medicine, the term syndrome is the association of several clinically recognizable features, signs, symptoms, phenomena or characteristics which often occur together, so that the presence of one feature alerts the physician to the presence of the others. In recent decades the term has been used outside of medicine to refer to a combination of phenomena seen in association.
I always hated the word Syndrome. It seem to put us people (with a some Syndrome or another) into our own classification, with a connotation of "inferiority", as if to say we're not normal. At least using words like "Moebian" and "Aspie" kinda takes the Syndrome part of it away, giving us more of a exclusive kind of status, like a certain uniqueness.
seeitrun2006
Well-known member
T-storms
Now if a thunder storm comes up in the day time unless the lightning is really close I'm usually sitting on my front porch watching it from my office window at work. A tornado passed one time near our house. My wife is in the half bath in the middle of our house taking cover. I'm poking my head out the front door listning as the darn thing passed by. Now as a child if I heard a clap of thunder and man I was under the bed, in the closet where ever I could do to get away from it.
I used to be scared of the dark but keep in mind I grew up in the day and age when in the early to middle sixties everyone was spotting UFO's. Everybody was building atomic bomb shelters. I had relatives on my dad's side who would loved to purposely scare me and my sister to death. They would chase abulances, fire trucks. They would drive around to find where the KKK was burning crosses. You would not believe how many car wrecks and houses burning down I saw when I was 6,7,8,9,10 years old. My folks use to watch Twlight Zone, Outer limits which scare the Hell out me also.No wonder I was on a mild sedative in the third grade. GEEZ!
I've always wondered just what were my dad thinking at the time.
Except for the Asperger I've seem to have managed to get into adulthood without too many problems. In fact the Asperger has beeen a blessing in disguise as it kept me out of trouble unlike my brothers and sister. I was too afraid of everything.
Now if a thunder storm comes up in the day time unless the lightning is really close I'm usually sitting on my front porch watching it from my office window at work. A tornado passed one time near our house. My wife is in the half bath in the middle of our house taking cover. I'm poking my head out the front door listning as the darn thing passed by. Now as a child if I heard a clap of thunder and man I was under the bed, in the closet where ever I could do to get away from it.
I used to be scared of the dark but keep in mind I grew up in the day and age when in the early to middle sixties everyone was spotting UFO's. Everybody was building atomic bomb shelters. I had relatives on my dad's side who would loved to purposely scare me and my sister to death. They would chase abulances, fire trucks. They would drive around to find where the KKK was burning crosses. You would not believe how many car wrecks and houses burning down I saw when I was 6,7,8,9,10 years old. My folks use to watch Twlight Zone, Outer limits which scare the Hell out me also.No wonder I was on a mild sedative in the third grade. GEEZ!
I've always wondered just what were my dad thinking at the time.
Except for the Asperger I've seem to have managed to get into adulthood without too many problems. In fact the Asperger has beeen a blessing in disguise as it kept me out of trouble unlike my brothers and sister. I was too afraid of everything.
westytoploader
Well-known member
- Joined
- Sep 4, 2004
- Messages
- 4,485
Up until a year ago, I always left a lamp on when I slept as ambient light was more comforting. Now, I mostly sleep in the dark, but sometimes when I feel like it I turn a light on. I always run the Sleep timer on my stereo and leave it in Video mode so I can listen to the TV without actually having it on. Other times I put the radio on the jazz station or AM 740 to listen to Coast to Coast.
westytoploader
Well-known member
- Joined
- Sep 4, 2004
- Messages
- 4,485
And when I was little, loud noises used to really scare me, and I HATED thunderstorms. The loud "sonic-boom" type of storms which rattle the windows and end up killing the power for a little while have surprised me a few times (especially when I didn't hear the lightning "crack" beforehand), but in general they don't bother me any more. At night I usually open the blinds so I can watch the lightning.
Sorry for not participating much in the discussion here. I was out on a sort of mini-vacation on the Chesapeake Bay since Wednesday. Just like a typical aspie, I have returned to a neat little campground I've frequented even as a kid, and even set up my trailer in the same spot! I joined my parents down there, and although I love my mom dearly, she just doesn't understand what bothers me.
She asked me to join them for meals over at their RV. Her cooking is great, but the atmosphere has a lot to be desired! My parents are in the rescue squad, so they always have the public service radio listening to the emergency vehicles going all the time. My mom also can't miss a newscast, so she had that going on the TV, that, coupled with the noisey D.C. exhaust fan in the camper, and all the lights in the thing going (during daylight hours) and it was just a little too much for me to take....It was nice to walk down to the docks afterwards and sit and just listen to the water and watch all the boats out at sea.
You guys speaking of touch issues, I experience issues with that too. I don't like to be touched, especially lightly, and unexpectedly. If someone says that they are going to touch me, it's not a big issue. My mother however is one to say "There's a piece of something on you" and just reach out brush off the fleck of whatever caught her eye, without having any respect to ask first...drives me bonkers!!!! I imagine the touching issue is something that helped shorten some of my relationships in the past for sure, especially since it was never clear to others what I actually like, and why.
Oddly enough, usually a more firm, heavy touch is a bit more pleasurable, than just something lightly brushing my skin. One of the strange things I've found I actually do like when it comes to the sense of touch is that heavy lead blanket that the Dentist uses when he X-rays me. I find the heavy weight and the warmpth of it to be very nice
The issue of touch has always been a factor in the clothing I wear. I tend to pick out high thread count clothing, and almost always wear cottons, silks, and other soft, pliable, "breathable" fabrics. I have yet to find any style, fabric, or type of undergarment that is comfortable yet, and believe me, I've tried quite a few! To aggrivate the clothing issue, I'm a rather small person, and it's hard not only to find comfortable clothing, but also find it small enough to fit me. Shopping is a nightmare too, because of all the noisy, busy stores with PA systems sqawking, TV's blaring, and annoying clerks that won't let you be and pick out your own thing.
Because if my issues with clothing, I just simply find it more comfortable just to not wear any when I'm in the privacy of my own home, or sleeping....and due to my very logical nature, I just can't seem to figure out why humans have such an aversion towards their own bodies...something that no other animal has! I don't see nudity as being very sexual at all...it's just another state to be in, just like wearing a suit, versus a T-shirt. Apparently, clothing does a lot more in society than just simply protecting our skin from the elements...it also carries a message of some sorts.
I'm like Jason in the sense to that my sleeping quarters must be perfect. Barking dogs drive me crazy too, and I find the warm hum of my window AC (yes the house has central air too!) helps drown them, along with many other annoying noises outside right out. O can't stand to have anything blocking my breath, and if I can feel my own wind blowing back on my skin, or to breathe it back in, I cannot sleep till the issue is corrected
Thanks for your insight Toggle into your experiences with Aspies!
She asked me to join them for meals over at their RV. Her cooking is great, but the atmosphere has a lot to be desired! My parents are in the rescue squad, so they always have the public service radio listening to the emergency vehicles going all the time. My mom also can't miss a newscast, so she had that going on the TV, that, coupled with the noisey D.C. exhaust fan in the camper, and all the lights in the thing going (during daylight hours) and it was just a little too much for me to take....It was nice to walk down to the docks afterwards and sit and just listen to the water and watch all the boats out at sea.
You guys speaking of touch issues, I experience issues with that too. I don't like to be touched, especially lightly, and unexpectedly. If someone says that they are going to touch me, it's not a big issue. My mother however is one to say "There's a piece of something on you" and just reach out brush off the fleck of whatever caught her eye, without having any respect to ask first...drives me bonkers!!!! I imagine the touching issue is something that helped shorten some of my relationships in the past for sure, especially since it was never clear to others what I actually like, and why.
Oddly enough, usually a more firm, heavy touch is a bit more pleasurable, than just something lightly brushing my skin. One of the strange things I've found I actually do like when it comes to the sense of touch is that heavy lead blanket that the Dentist uses when he X-rays me. I find the heavy weight and the warmpth of it to be very nice
The issue of touch has always been a factor in the clothing I wear. I tend to pick out high thread count clothing, and almost always wear cottons, silks, and other soft, pliable, "breathable" fabrics. I have yet to find any style, fabric, or type of undergarment that is comfortable yet, and believe me, I've tried quite a few! To aggrivate the clothing issue, I'm a rather small person, and it's hard not only to find comfortable clothing, but also find it small enough to fit me. Shopping is a nightmare too, because of all the noisy, busy stores with PA systems sqawking, TV's blaring, and annoying clerks that won't let you be and pick out your own thing.
Because if my issues with clothing, I just simply find it more comfortable just to not wear any when I'm in the privacy of my own home, or sleeping....and due to my very logical nature, I just can't seem to figure out why humans have such an aversion towards their own bodies...something that no other animal has! I don't see nudity as being very sexual at all...it's just another state to be in, just like wearing a suit, versus a T-shirt. Apparently, clothing does a lot more in society than just simply protecting our skin from the elements...it also carries a message of some sorts.
I'm like Jason in the sense to that my sleeping quarters must be perfect. Barking dogs drive me crazy too, and I find the warm hum of my window AC (yes the house has central air too!) helps drown them, along with many other annoying noises outside right out. O can't stand to have anything blocking my breath, and if I can feel my own wind blowing back on my skin, or to breathe it back in, I cannot sleep till the issue is corrected
Thanks for your insight Toggle into your experiences with Aspies!
toggleswitch
Well-known member
You too!
toggleswitch
Well-known member
I think of a SYNDROME as PEOPLE on a common road, running together.
Think of people on two parallel roads that cross over each-other occasionally.
http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/syndrome
Think of people on two parallel roads that cross over each-other occasionally.
http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/syndrome
toggleswitch
Well-known member
May I vent?
Today, as I was clearing the dinner plates, I asked simply "Have you finished" You would think a simple yes or no would do. "Well, can't you see that I'm done?
Mister Mister also has to SELECT each piece of the meal.
Which piece of meat, which piece of corn etc.
PICKY PICKY PICKY. Thank the lawd you have food and a roof over your head, and water and fuel ec. Be thankful in general.
RRRRRRRRRRRRR How I have not slapped him backhanded into next week!
Today, as I was clearing the dinner plates, I asked simply "Have you finished" You would think a simple yes or no would do. "Well, can't you see that I'm done?
Mister Mister also has to SELECT each piece of the meal.
Which piece of meat, which piece of corn etc.
PICKY PICKY PICKY. Thank the lawd you have food and a roof over your head, and water and fuel ec. Be thankful in general.
RRRRRRRRRRRRR How I have not slapped him backhanded into next week!
bobbyderegis
Well-known member
Do I sense a wee bit of hostility in your tone, Steve???
Bobby in Boston
Bobby in Boston
sudsmaster
Well-known member
The interesting thing is that most of the symptoms of Asberger's and other syndromes mentioned here occur in the "unafflicted". That is, I can see such behaviors and traits in myself and others. But, I think it probably that it's the degree to which these traits are displayed and acted upon that makes the difference.
Me, I love neckrubs. Never have gotten enough of them. Now I have a couple of cats and they crave neckrubs (and ear massages) also. But they only receive them... never had a cat even try to reciprocate
Me, I love neckrubs. Never have gotten enough of them. Now I have a couple of cats and they crave neckrubs (and ear massages) also. But they only receive them... never had a cat even try to reciprocate
jasonl
New member
Yeah, I'm a picky eater like that, that's just his personality. The smart remark he said might deserve a slap but not just for picking which piece of food he wanted. Personality conflict: not good.
toggleswitch
Well-known member
Sorry. After so many years of dealing with a rebelious *teen-ager*, it is tough.
jasonl
New member
No problem
I understand. It's hard living with no stability. One day, your partner's the best, and the next day he's a "rebellious 'teenager'". Well, I shouldn't have said anything in the first place.
I understand. It's hard living with no stability. One day, your partner's the best, and the next day he's a "rebellious 'teenager'". Well, I shouldn't have said anything in the first place.
toggleswitch
Well-known member
One day, your partner is the best, and the next day he's a "rebellious 'teenager".
He is both simultaneously.
Herein lies the mystery of love; Caring for someone with your eyes WIDE-OPEN to their faults, (which of course are always worse than one's own faults!) HA!
He is both simultaneously.
Herein lies the mystery of love; Caring for someone with your eyes WIDE-OPEN to their faults, (which of course are always worse than one's own faults!) HA!
jasonl
New member
Caring for someone with your eyes WIDE-OPEN to their faults,
That's exactly true. You love them, warts and all.
That's exactly true. You love them, warts and all.
jasonl
New member
It's not about having the best body, it's about being spiritually, physically, and emotionally compatible. If that's the case, then do the above.
no, no hostility, it was just a little stressful last week dealing with my parents, even though I love them dearly and they are certainly great people. My mom, especially tends to be a little hard headed, and oddly enough, unforgiving. I can tell her nicely that something is bothering me, and she will basically ignore the request to stop/change, etc. whatever it is. really did though have a great time on my vacation. A vacation for me involves going to a place I don't need to drive, doesn't have telephone service, and I'm free to do my own thing whenever I want. The little campground we went to on the Chesapeake Bay surely fit the bill!!!
Yea, there are some things about being an Aspie that are not necessarily the greatest, but by and large, I have enjoyed the logical reasoning ability, and the other intelligence associated with it. It can just be a bit hard trying to communictate with others, especally understanding how feelings can make such a major impact in their decisions
Yea, there are some things about being an Aspie that are not necessarily the greatest, but by and large, I have enjoyed the logical reasoning ability, and the other intelligence associated with it. It can just be a bit hard trying to communictate with others, especally understanding how feelings can make such a major impact in their decisions
seeitrun2006
Well-known member
Dealing with parents
I have no hostility towards my parents either. My parents don't know that I'm an Aspie. They think I'm just a picky person who has an unusual obession with Washers and had a horrible time in school and relationships. It shock the hell out of them when I announced I was getting married. They do things too that drives me crazy but I just literally just have to look away.
I'm just about to turn 50 in Nov. and don't really see the need to tell them since my dad is 77 my mom is 73. They really would not understand it.
I've only told one brother about it as his daughter is an Aspie but they are in denial and will not acknowledge anything is wrong. She's in fifth grade and I can see me in her from a mile away.
Peace!
I have no hostility towards my parents either. My parents don't know that I'm an Aspie. They think I'm just a picky person who has an unusual obession with Washers and had a horrible time in school and relationships. It shock the hell out of them when I announced I was getting married. They do things too that drives me crazy but I just literally just have to look away.
I'm just about to turn 50 in Nov. and don't really see the need to tell them since my dad is 77 my mom is 73. They really would not understand it.
I've only told one brother about it as his daughter is an Aspie but they are in denial and will not acknowledge anything is wrong. She's in fifth grade and I can see me in her from a mile away.
Peace!
toggleswitch
Well-known member
Denial is not just a river in Egypt
So sad that an insight into their child is avaialable, and they chose not to see it / use it.
Perhaps she could have been made aware (gently) of her *wiring* and worked with /around it so as to avoid future frustrations.
So sad that an insight into their child is avaialable, and they chose not to see it / use it.
Perhaps she could have been made aware (gently) of her *wiring* and worked with /around it so as to avoid future frustrations.
seeitrun2006
Well-known member
My niece with Asperger
Funny thing is when family members try to talk to her or tease her she get frustrated, shuts down and goes off by herself.
However I being the Aspie that I am can sit down beside her, touch very little, no eye contact and carry on a simple conversation with her. One time she sat with me for an hour or two when she would not sit with anyone else. I think she senses a common bond with me because of Asperger which she has no idea what it is.
I come from a family of 3-brothers and 1- sister and of course my mom and dad and bunches of nieces and nephews. At a family gathering my niece usually will go off by herself (just like I use to and still do)then someone will miss her. She will be off playing with her dolls or whatever in her own world. The strange thing is her birthday is only a couple days after mine and we are both Aspies.
Funny thing is when family members try to talk to her or tease her she get frustrated, shuts down and goes off by herself.
However I being the Aspie that I am can sit down beside her, touch very little, no eye contact and carry on a simple conversation with her. One time she sat with me for an hour or two when she would not sit with anyone else. I think she senses a common bond with me because of Asperger which she has no idea what it is.
I come from a family of 3-brothers and 1- sister and of course my mom and dad and bunches of nieces and nephews. At a family gathering my niece usually will go off by herself (just like I use to and still do)then someone will miss her. She will be off playing with her dolls or whatever in her own world. The strange thing is her birthday is only a couple days after mine and we are both Aspies.
Teasing and making fun of someone is something that I just don't get. Supposedly, it is done in humor and to establish a bond between people. Just like your niece, it just distances me. I can't seem to figure out why on earth it is considered humorous and an act of friendship to exploit someone's shortcomings. Humor, overall seems to be mostly centered on exploiting someone's mistakes or shortcomings, and many think that I lack a sense of humor becasue I don't make fun of other people, and I don't "get" their humor when it's directed at me. It's not that I don't have a sense of humor, it's just that I don't think what they are doing is humorous.
I imagine this all comes back to what I see is a relentless need for competition among individuals in society. Men, especially, like to be better than a peer in whatever it may be, even it it does not really get them anywhere. It is subtle, but revealed in anything from what car to buy, how someone talks, even where they live. When someone finds out that they aren't better at something in particular, they will use humor to ridicule that person...thus we have the bully. This is probably one of the reasons why I don't like sports. It's just about someone else trying to prove they are better at something, but the effort to me appears to be fruitless. To me, I feel that working together with others to solve problems is not only more productive, but also much more fun....one of the reasons why I enjoy my job. We all work together to build a/v systems and make a bigger, better, fancier system than the last one we did. Not because we want to be better than another out there, but because we want to challenge ourselves to go beyond.
Like you mention, I can enjoy carrying out an intelligent conversation with another person, sharing discoveries, and experiences in a relaxed manner. Eye contact is not required, nor is dramatic speech, just clear, objective talk without a lot of metaphors and other stuff that takes a lot of mental power to figure out!
I imagine this all comes back to what I see is a relentless need for competition among individuals in society. Men, especially, like to be better than a peer in whatever it may be, even it it does not really get them anywhere. It is subtle, but revealed in anything from what car to buy, how someone talks, even where they live. When someone finds out that they aren't better at something in particular, they will use humor to ridicule that person...thus we have the bully. This is probably one of the reasons why I don't like sports. It's just about someone else trying to prove they are better at something, but the effort to me appears to be fruitless. To me, I feel that working together with others to solve problems is not only more productive, but also much more fun....one of the reasons why I enjoy my job. We all work together to build a/v systems and make a bigger, better, fancier system than the last one we did. Not because we want to be better than another out there, but because we want to challenge ourselves to go beyond.
Like you mention, I can enjoy carrying out an intelligent conversation with another person, sharing discoveries, and experiences in a relaxed manner. Eye contact is not required, nor is dramatic speech, just clear, objective talk without a lot of metaphors and other stuff that takes a lot of mental power to figure out!
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