cell phones...

[vacuumfreeeke]

I wanted to start a thread to talk about cell phone use for a little bit.

*Almost* everyone has a cell phone these days. Typically, owning a cell phone means throwing manners out the window. Personally, I have very specific rules about cell phone use that I adhere to. I never talk on the phone in a public place (be it restaurants or grocery stores, or any other public place), and the ringer is completely off while I'm at work. If I must talk on the phone while I'm out, I go and sit in my car so I don't annoy other people. I do talk and drive (though I do have a bluetooth headset)... I don't think that talking on the phone is any worse than talking to a fellow passenger or singing along with the radio. If dialing is the safety issue, then one can do that before starting the engine or at a red light.

Anyway, the issue I'm having becuase of cell phones is that they are being used as a leash. I'm kind of seeing a guy right now who seems to have trust issues. If I miss his call I almost have to explain the reason why! When I call him back after having missed a call, he'll say something like, "Well, I tried to call, but you didn't answer. I was hoping to talk to you, what happened?" I think he says that so I will tell him that I wasn't with another guy or something. I usually say, "Well, we're talking now. Do you want to have a real conversation, or do you want to talk about talking on the phone?" Or, "Well, I couldn't answer because I was in the arms of my other lover. But we're done now, how are you?" This guy and I aren't even exclusive yet (though he's made it clear he wants to be "with" me, I enjoy being single and don't feel ready for a relationship) and he's alreayd getting jealous and wondering what I'm doing when I miss his calls! Why do I need to explain myself? Has that happened to any of you before? How did you handle it? I've been jealous before too, so I know that it's not a comfortable feeling to wonder if someone you're interested in is with other people, but before even establishing a relationship... I think that's a bit much!

I hear stories about girls with jealous boyfriends who get angry if they can't be reached at any time by their phone (leash). I wonder what would happen if I just took the battery out of my phone for two days! Anyone else "unplug" like that before? Was it liberating?

What do you think?

Thanks )

 

[shanonabc]

I have an iPhone and it comes with me everywhere... I will email and SMS from it when around people but if a call comes or goes I have to leave the room/building...

I work in a Deli and refuse to serve people who are chatting away... It is a waste of my time trying to lip read.

 

[whirlcool]

I make a lot of people mad the way I use my cell phone and not for reasons that you would think.

I only use my cell phone as a "phone away from home". When I am home it is usually sitting in the charger, turned off. I usually use it on trips, and the majority of the few phone calls I get are from Karen, or company dispatch.
When I am in a restaurant and it rings, I cancel the ringer and look to see who is calling. If it is work, I'll go outside and return the call, otherwise I'll return the call later.
I get a LOT of comments "We tried to call you but all we got was your voice mail". My reply is usually "I was at home and my cell phone was turned off" and then the other person usually comments "Then why do you have a cell phone in the first place?"
When I am away from home I use it to call home, call places of business to check on an order, are they open, things like that.
I didn't get my first cell phone until 2000 or so, and that was only because our company required us to have them. Believe it or not I know a lot of guys who still don't have one for the very reason mentioned in the original post. They don't want to have a "leash" on them. But for our airline members that are working reserve they can be a god send, you aren't confined to your house waiting for the phone to ring. You can get out a little bit.

 

[rp2813]

I refuse to be a slave to my cell phone. I reluctantly had to give out the number when things were nearing the end with my mom, and then with all of the various entities we were dealing with in the aftermath.

I don't even like being interrupted on the land line at home. Some of this can be traced back to the advent of things like "call waiting" on land lines. When is the last time you heard a "busy" signal? That sound will probably go the way of the time lady at some point. People expect to either have you answer or to be given the option to leave a message. And some refuse to settle for that. If they are calling your cell, they expect to reach you, period.

Personally, if I had someone trying to keep me on a cell phone leash, I'd advise them in no uncertain terms that I'll answer MY cell when I want to, and if they couldn't cope with that I'd dump their ass. Anyone with the sort of personality that needs to exercise that level of control is sick and should be quickly eliminated from one's social circle.

Cell phones are addicting. I think the commuter train wreck a week ago that killed 26 people in Southern California is a classic example of the worst that can happen as a result of cell phone addiction and/or abuse. But will people learn from that? Nooooooooooooooo.

 

[toggleswitch2]

Remember when a family of 5 had ONE phone number?
Now each person has 5 phone numbers.
At first the cell phone was a luxury to me. Now it is an indispensible (sp?) business tool.

Still cant stand the fools tht are holding the phone to their heds while driving or worse, texting.

Rumour has it that those two trains that collided recently (was it in California?) happend due to the engineer texting.

Just remember boys and girls I was involed in a cell phone company WAY at the beginnig when potable phones were the size of a shoe box (and not ones that fit the shoes of a Chinese woman whose feet were bound, either)! It was known from the very beginning that cell phones may not exceed (IIRC) three watts of output or one fries the brains sooner, rather than later!

Please don't drive withot a hands-free headset.
And for G-d's sake-- look up when crossing the street and talking on the phone. If you are crossing the street with a baby carriage methinks it is CRIMINAL to be distracted with a cell phone conversation.

Discussing your feelings and thoughts and gossiping ad-nauseum may feel great to you, but please not at the risk of hurting or killing all of us who are physically near you when walking or driving.

Boy am I complaining today! LOL sorry.

 

[rp2813]

Steve, yes, that train wreck last week was caused by texting, even though it's going to take a year for the NTSB to officially say so. Metrolink came out right away and advised that texting was the cause. The NTSB has only stated that the engineer was indeed texting but won't say at exactly what time. Recipients of the text messages say the last one came in one minute before the crash occurred. The paper also said that the California Public Utilities Commission ruled yesterday that no engineers in this state can use a cell phone. Individual agencies may or may not have had this rule in place already, but now it covers all trains in the state. Apparently there is no such federal rule yet.

What amazes me is that there was ever any doubt that cell phone use while piloting tons upon tons of locomotion would lead to catastrophic results. You'd think any particle of doubt would have been removed after last week's tragedy.

 

[gyrafoam]

been REAR ended twice by other drivers using their cell phones here in atlanta. I even think twice before dining out because of their use. I have taken the stance that if it bothers me, I adjust, and try to avoid exposure as much as possible.

 

[maytagbear]

I got a cell phone in May

and I am mixed about it.

Kind friends from church added me to their plan, I give them 10.00 a month.

It's a nice enough LG from Verizon.

I hate feeling as though I have to have a cell, but coin phones have diminished greatly in the last few years.

I have been shifting more of my long distance calls to the cell, even though it is slightly less clear than my landline.

I keep it on "vibrate" most of the time, and turn it off COMPLETELY in church, or meetings of my support group, or movies.

Had a cell waaay back in the analog days of '98-2001, when my Ma was very ill and needed to reach me at any time, and that was good, but didn't have one for years.

Mixed blessing, mixed blessing.

Lawrence/Maytagbear

 

[toggleswitch2]

~been REAR ended twice by other drivers using their cell phones here in Atlanta.

Hmmm why use the cell phone in bed when the landline is right there?

And why would one use a cell phone up there, anyway?

 

[countryguy]

My cell phone is in the glove compartment of my car - turned off. The only time it is turned on is if I need to make an emergency call or if I am traveling out of town and need to make a call. It is for emergency purposes only. I have no desire to carry it with me anywhere. And there is nothing I hate more than to be walking in a mall, sitting in a restaurant, etc. and hear the people talking on their cell phones. I also refuse to have call waiting on my home phone. If someone tries to call and I am on the phone, they can leave a message or call back. Nothing is so important that I should be rude to the person I am speaking with, put them on hold and take another call. If someone does that to me...then I hang up on them rather than wait for them to get back to my call.

Gary

 

[hoover_elite]

I have this....

I have had this thing since 2001. All I can say is its tough as a rock, but AT&T has been stalking me lately to get a new phone.

(the case has been replaced with another phone, but its at&T ven though it says verizon)

http://mail.google.com/mail/?ui=2&ik=fb0fe034f7&attid=0.1&disp=inline&view=att&th=11c7c8aeb2945045
http://mail.google.com/mail/?ui=2&ik=fb0fe034f7&attid=0.2&disp=inline&view=att&th=11c7c8aeb2945045

 

[petek]

I had to have a cell phone for work reasons 24/7 pretty much from the day they were invented, remember the old ones in a bag. I didn't use it for person stuff and always prayed it wouldn't ring. When I retired I was so glad to get rid of it. My partner has one for his business etc but I will never have one by choice. There's nobody on this planet including my own elderly mother whom I love to death that I need a cell phone to keep in touch with.
I also keep our home landline set for about 8 rings before the answering machine kicks in. It's amazing how many people just hang up about the 3rd or 4th ring and ask why you weren't home or why I don't have an answering machine. I don't drop what I'm doing and rush over to answer the phone. I may put it down and walk over but that's it and if they can't wait for 6-7 rings too bad for them cause I really don't care anymore.

 

[andrewinorlando]

I use it as my only phone...won't pay ridiculous landline prices to have one in the house too, no need. It comes with me wherever I go, and has saved my ass on a few occassions too. If it rings and it's a convenient time, I answer it, otherwise there's always voicemail. I have no trouble driving and talking at the same time, though it's not something I prefer to do since I really don't like talking on the phone much to begin with. Has an excellent hands free feature that really comes in handy in the car, and a voice dial that works great. Can't ask for more. There are people I want to be able to get in touch with me at a moment's notice, and my team at work does need to reach me when out of the office, so it stays with me always. For everyone else, there's voicemail. Like anything else, a cell phone is a tool...use it as you need to use it, but be considerate of others at the same time. The folks at the table behind you don't need to hear about the great new brand of lube you and your boyfriend tried out last night.

As for boyfriends using it as a leash, there too, is voicemail. Drives them crazy!! And no, I wouldn't answer it just because "he" was calling. He'll get over it, trust me. And if he doesn't....bye bye birdie......

 

[charbee]

[rant]

We still don't have one, and probably won't get one unless forced to. Then, it would be something like that "jitterbug" thing that has REAL BIG BUTTONS and only makes phone calls. Our eyes are gettin' old, and who can really enjoy a movie on a 2" screen? Have enough trouble seeing the numbers on the tiny screen of the cordless we have.

Besides nearly being killed on a regular basis by idiots talking while they drive, I absolutely hate the rudeness with which people wield them: shrieking into them at top volume while ignoring their cashier at the grocery store, etc. Why do they "need" for us to hear them? Does it make them feel important?

And the people that really creep me out are the ones with them implanted in their ear like some sort of "Locutus of Borg" device. We were in Central Market a couple of weeks ago and noticed this woman just shouting to the air, gesturing with her hands, staring at some imaginary spot in front of her, while she was standing in line at the deli. She just shouted her side of the conversation as loud as she could, while everyone either ignored her or stared. When it was finally her turn at the deli counter, she didn't stop talking, just gestured to the clerk and kept on shrieking. Twenty-thirty years ago they'd've sent for the men in white coats and the butterfly net. I have to fight back the temptation to smack people like that.

whew...OK, I'm done.

[/rant]

 

[rp2813]

If I gave up my land line I couldn't use my vintage phone anymore. My 1950 model 500 is my desk phone where I conduct all of my business. These days, menus are voice-activated and you don't even need a touchpad. I like the feel of a firm grip on a solid handset that was built better than anything American Tourister ever dreamed of. I'll never give up my land line. It's the most reliable service in the house and always has been. We lose power during a storm plenty of times but I think I can count on one hand the number of times the phone was knocked out in my lifetime.

Cell phones are out of control. We are stuck with people on cell phones behind the wheel and it's going to take MANY catastrophic accidents caused by cell phone use to even have any attempt to legislate their use go forward. It will be a civil liberties issue and another freedom that would be taken away, blah blah blah.

What the cell phone addicts and abusers don't realize is that with freedom also comes an equal dose of responsibility. Failure to adhere to that concept is what has fuched up this country over the past couple of generations and it is rapidly getting much worse with cell phone abuse kicking it up a few notches.

It's going to get a whole lot worse before it gets better.

As for the "locust" device, they are commonly known as "Blue Tooth" headsets and are required when behind the wheel in California and a few other states. The law in California has been on the books less than three months; there were constant reminders in the media about the new law and it seemed at first that people were complying. But the fine is low and again, less than three months into it people are already ignoring the law and you see more people holding phones to their ears while driving than you do using a Blue Tooth type device. See my earlier remarks about adhering to the freedom and responsibility concept.

 

[bleacho]

wow, good subject..

its really disgusting to see our world so obsessed with talking and communicating.. i was in the store yesterday, next in line. i was holding a heavy box. the customer before me was oblivios to the surroundings, remained at the counter trying to communicate to the cashier, while carrying on a stupid conversation with someone on the phone.. she continued on and on, holding up the line, then i finally jumped in and asked her to "move along already" she looked at me as if i had the problem..
i simply cant imagine what people have to say thats so urgent they have to make a call at any given moment... while walking across a manhattan street, driving, etc.. its just crazy!!! what a great topic- its so out of hand..

 

[alanlendaro]

for charbee's rant

I hear you! I am always amused by the people talking to the cukes and zucchinis at the grocery. I actually started to engage someone in conversation and she quite emphatically stated that "she wasn't talking to herself, she was on the PHONE!". She had one of those ear appendages that wasn't easily seen. I laughed and just started talking about the size of the cukes. And do not get me started about talking on the cell while driving, even on hands free! You may think you are safe, but you are a hazard! A study in Brittan was done a few years ago that said you were safer with 2 drinks in you then talking on a hands free cell phone. I have the cell phone integration in the car but rarely use it. My partner was following me home one night and I called him to tell him I needed to stop for fuel. He was right behind me and said my driving went to shit as soon as i was on the phone - and this is with hands free, voice command, etc. I hate cell phones.

 

[sudsmaster]

Be careful. People who insist on staying in constant contact may not just have trust issues - they may have control issues. And sometimes those people turn out to be violent abusers.

 

[rp2813]

Rich, you are so right!

 

[charbee]

Indeed...anyone who "needs to know" what you're doing or where you are at any given moment has things to deal with.

It gets back to the point I've always wondered about with this whole "instant communication" thing: what the hell are they all talking about? I think I've said just about everything I need to say, except for mundane daily convo that can be had by land-line in a safe environment. My parents didn't talk on the phone while they drove...that was science fiction! I fail to see what all this "communication" is doing except to fuel the collective paranoia...Or are we just getting old? Damn this "new paradigm" anyway...;-)

 

[appliances4me]

ok

heres what I think. A cell phone is a phone and should be used just as that. If I did not answer it is because I was busy doing something else. Those signs of having a leash almost always lead to something else unless you have a talk and can come to some sort of an understanding. My partners mom tried this for a while till he had a come to jesus meetin with her. She now will not blow up the phone unless it is really important. I do not have a house phone so this is my phone. I used 154 minutes last month. Yes I am social but I text and work a full time job and go to school. As far as etiquette goes I almost never talk in a check out line or somewhere that my attention is necessary.

 

[kirk280980]

Rich has hit the nail firmly on the head. This whole electronic leash business is what eventually persuaded me to give my ex the heave-ho. He would call at all hours of the day and night, and leave whiny voicemails demanding to know WHY I hadn't been back in touch sooner. He'd also set up his phone to notify him whenever I read one of his text messages (so as to work out how long it took me to get round to responding). At first I thought he was just insecure and needy, and that I would have to gently break him out of this habit. After more than a year, however, it finally dawned on me that he was actually a subtle control freak who was trying to keep tabs on me 24/7.

It all backfired when he called for what felt like the millionth time in one day to ask me what I was doing now. Somehow I don't think "Dumping you, because I'm tired of all your shit" was quite the response he was hoping for.

These days I keep my phone switched on Mon-Fri, 9:00-18:00. Those are my business hours, and outside of those times I am not available to take calls. Clients know they can e-mail me on evenings and weekends for a more or less immediate response, which is fine because it doesn't involve talking and I'm usually sat at the computer working anyway. The only people I give my landline number to are friends and selected relatives, and even they usually e-mail first to ask if it's OK to call. Can you tell I really don't like talking on the phone? LOL.

 

[whirlcool]

And the people that really creep me out are the ones with them implanted in their ear like some sort of "Locutus of Borg" device.

Usually I find people who have those blue tooth ear pieces usually have an overblown sense of self importance. When they first came out I encountered a guy at MSP airport standing in the exit to the driveway ramp doors. That thing was protruding from his ear and blinking too. Every time our crew tried to pass him in the vestibule, he'd block our way and just say "Can't you see I'm on the phone?". Idiot.
Then a number of years ago we were in line at the grocery store and a soccer mom type was engrossed in a cell phone conversation while the cashier was ringing up her groceries.
When the cashier told her the total amount owed, she ignored the cashier a few times and just kept talking on her cell phone. Finally the cashier shouted at her "Mam', YOUR TOTAL IS $212.41!! PLEASE PAY NOW!" What did this soccer mom say? "You'll just have to wait, can't you see I'm on the phone!"
Then I just said "Lady, just PAY your fuckin' bill!". The look I got out of her was so shocking she hung up her cell phone and paid the bill.

Here is a joke I heard from another pilot a month ago or so.
"What's the difference between a woman driving a Suburban and talking on a cell phone and a drink driver?"
The drunk is at least TRYING to drive....

 

[whirlpolf]

cell phone wake-up bashing (my favorite outdoor sports) ;-))

I've lived in Amsterdam for some time, there it is even worse with cell phones: Some "ladies" use it just for fake to get through the crowd more easily. You know those mid-30s horsebutt blond barbie dolls with brickshaped heels, they hold a cell phone to their ear and talk very noisily to "someone" while stampeding and dashing through a crowd, while being "first" through a revolving door in a bank or for "not having noticed" the queue at a grociers. They expect all mortals to skip away and make room for them. (Most of the time it works and most of the time they really ARE speaking to someone, but more than once I've caught them tucking away the phone without even pressing the red button.) This means: They were just playacting, not talking to anyone. The mobile is just a tool to get through the crowd.

When I spot such a person (also guys here, the typical suited "I won't even look at the lowly mob, I am the king of Wall Street" business monger), I will stop walking and stand there, not giving an inch and just wait for them to crash into me at full speed. Most get quite mean and insulting, some get bossy and then I just point to the phone and say nothing. That makes my day and ruins theirs! )))

 

[spankomatic]

My cell phone theory...

Cell phones is the cause of GLOBAL WARMING. The increase in cell phone usage is causing the magnetic field to super heat the earth. Kinda fits the time line when you think about it... I say turn them OFF.

Just a theory.....

Jim

 

[toploader55]

Has anyone...

Been reading about the danger of Brain Tumors from Cell Phones ? There really is no long term study on the use of Cell Phones . They've really only been around for what ???16-18 years ?
I just can't see what is so important that can't wait until later. I want to whack people in the head when they come into my restaurant yakking away. Actually anywhere. Rudeness abounds anyway these days. I see everyday as well as all of you Get into vehicle, Start Vehicle, Fasten Seatbelt, Engage Cell Phone and Mouth.
I like them for emergengies, but unless I am expecting a call from someone, I generally never answer my phone until I'm ready to or have time.

 

[andrewinorlando]

I love taking my cell phone shopping with me. It is the best way I have found to avoid being ambushed by pushy sales people without constantly having to tell them to "piss off". I just walk throught the mall and have a conversation with whomever, and all those annoying individuals who seem to assault you (and even follow you and continue pitching) as you walk down the center aisle, pushing this service or that product, pretty much ignore you...just the way I like it. Inside stores, sales people won't even come near when they see me on a phone...just the way I like it. If I need something, I'll go find a salesperson, but I despise being followed through a store by one of the vultures who just won't take the hint. Seems the cell phone has natural repellent powers!!

I was always curious though as to just what's the difference driving while talking on a cell phone versus driving while carrying on one or more conversations with people in your car? Why is one okay and not the other? Would seem your attention would be just as "diverted" since most people tend to talk while gesturing and/or while looking at the folks in the back seat through the rear view mirror, or the person next to them directly. I see this regularly, especially people with kids in the back seat. Why doesn't anyone talk about legislation to ban all conversation in a moving vehicle??? Seems to me that one is just as potentially dangerous as the other since you can't drive forward all that well while looking backwards at the folks in your back seat.

 

[alanlendaro]

Andrew, check this article out

here are some snippets from it and I post the complete link to the article for your reference.

"We have seen again and again that there is no difference between hands-free and hand-held devices," Drews said. "The problem is the conversation," he added.

According to Drews, drivers talking on the phone are paying attention to the conversation -- not their driving. "Drivers are not perceiving the driving environment," he said. "We found 50 percent of the visual information wasn't processed at all -- this could be a red light. This increases the risk of getting into an accident dramatically," he said.

...

In the study, 40 people followed a pace car along a prescribed course, using a driving simulator. Some people drove while talking on a cell phone, others navigated while drunk (meaning their blood-alcohol limit matched the legal limit of 0.08 percent), and others drove with no such distractions or impairments.

"We found an increased accident rate when people were conversing on the cell phone," Drews said. Drivers on cell phones were 5.36 times more likely to get in an accident than non-distracted drivers, the researchers found.

The phone users fared even worse than the inebriated, the Utah team found. There were three accidents among those talking on cell phones -- all of them involving a rear-ending of the pace car. In contrast, there were no accidents recorded among participants who were drunk, or the sober, cell-phone-free group.

The bottom line: Cell-phone use was linked to "a significant increase in the accident rate," Drews said.

He said there was a difference between the behaviors of drunk drivers and those who were talking on the phone. Drunk drivers tended to be aggressive, while those talking on the phone were more sluggish, Drews said.

...

Tyson pointed out that talking on the phone is very different than talking to the person in the passenger seat. "If you are engaged in a conversation with a passenger, the passenger has some situational awareness, whereas a person on the phone has no idea what you are dealing with on the road," he said.

"Our recommendation is that you should not talk on the phone while driving, whether it's a hand-held or hand-free device," Tyson said. "We realize that a lot of people believe that they can multi-task, and in a lot of situations they probably can, but it's that moment when you need your full attention, and it's not there because you are busy talking, that you increase the likelihood that you are going to be involved in a crash," he said.

http://www.cellphonedefense.com/catalog/articles.php?tPath=24

 

[andrewinorlando]

That's very interesting.....thanks for the linkie....

I guess the bottom line is that we all need to be the defensive drivers we should be to protect ourselves and our passengers.

 

[Cybrvanr]

difference between in-person and the phone is data compressi

Why is it so dangerous to talk on the phone while driving? It's because of the poor audio quality of the phone. A cell phone converts audio to digital data, where it is sent over the airways and data networks, this is why they are so cheap. More conversations can be crammed into a radio channel, or a data line if there is less data there, so cell phone companies compress the data.

Data compression works by loosing components of the information. The problem is that it removes so much that conversations can be made challenging. The frequency response of most phones is about 500-3000hz, which is lower than the 5000hz that land-lines use. The other problem is the dynamic range, which is barely even 10db. The lack of dynamic range is the reason why percussive sounds like "P" or "T" or "D" or"B" all sound the same. It is up to the listener to decipher what is actually being said through the context of the conversation...and that requires brain power (that is diverted from the road) This is describing a cellular conversation while the signal is good. Throw in an iffy signal, so it's dropping syllables, and some background noise of the car going down the highway, and you really have a lot of concentration diverted to the phone conversation, and away from the road!