Some sad news

Automatic Washer - The world's coolest Washing Machines, Dryers and Dishwashers

Help Support AutomaticWasher.org:

washman

Well-known member
Joined
Sep 8, 2013
Messages
1,972
Location
o
All,
I learned today that my dad passed away at the age of 73. I always call him 2x per day, just to BS and make sure he's ok.
Well, today he did not answer the phone and I figured well, he's in the bathroom or something. I called back serveral times including his cell, no answer.

Finally I was able to reach a neighbor and he was discovered in his clothes on the living room floor. He had been dead for a while. Just yesterday I spoke with him and he seemed fine.

I learned from the medical examiner that it was natural causes. Dad was diabetic, had heart issues, and some issues with his bp medicine. They did not see evidence of foul play or any drug intoxication (he has to take a plethora of drugs).

He lived in Florida, was a Vietnam vet, factory worker, husband, father and well liked by many people.

My other died in 2007 so now it it just me. I'm an only child and I have no close relatives on dad's side and on monm's side they are scattered across Europe and the mid east. Suffice it to say, I have to go at this one alone.

I will have a crew come in and give me a price for the contents of the home, then put it up for sale. I want nothing to do with it now that both my parents are gone just too many memories. I have a pile of crap to deal with attorneys and the like along with making the unpleasant calls to relatives and financial institutions.

I may not be on here depending on when I have to go down there to handle the final affairs. I'll manage......somehow. Not sure but I will cope as best I can.
 
Ben,
I'm so sorry to hear about your father passing away. From reading many of your previous posts I know you were very close to him. If it's any consolation, at least he went quickly and didn't have to suffer prolonged illness and pain. But for you this is rough. You didn't get to say a last goodbye, and thats hard to deal with. I lost my dad when I was 11, he died in an auto accident, so I know how difficult a sudden death is.

You have a level head on your shoulders, so take it one step at a time, You will get through this and sometimes it will be hard. I've had to deal with the aftermath from losing an elderly relative too. Make sure you get at least 2 certified copies of his death certificate, you will need them. And be sure to notify Social Security right away so there won't be any overpayment of benefits.

The fact that you spoke with your Dad daily shows that he surely knew that you loved him. So take comfort that you were on good terms with no baggage to deal with. I have lost both of my parents, my Mom in 2004 and Dad in 1962. There is not a day that I don't think of them and my happy memories of them always make me feel good. So, keep those happy times close in your thoughts and they will help you get through this sad and difficult time. And know that there are a lot of people here on this website that are all hoping the best for you.
Best Regards,
Eddie
 
Ben, I'm so sorry your Dad has passed away. I've been through it with my parents and step-dad. You are a strong guy and you'll find the determination to take care of everything that's in your hands, now. Keep putting one foot in front of the other; you'll get through it. Always keep in mind that you've been a good son and that your Dad most certainly loved you. Words are so inadequate at times like these, but please know my thoughts are with you. Keep us posted as to how you're doing when you have time, OK?
 
Ben,
I am very sorry for your loss. It's been a year since I lost my mom who was my best friend. When I'm alone (which is most of the day other than work) I still have a rough time with it. It's really tough when you realize there are no parents left to take care of/call anymore and you are alone.
 
Ben,

So sorry to hear this sad news.  May he rest in peace and may you find solace in knowing he went quickly.  Cherish the fact that you spoke with him just yesterday.  

Thought and prayers are with you in the days ahead.

Jim
 
Ben

I am sincerely sorry for your dad's passing. Know that I will pray for his soul at Church.

My sister and I went through a similar situation. Our father was found dead by a neighbor in their senile-citizen complex. He always had the place locked-up like Ft. Knox, it's amazing that the front door was open. The neighbor found him naked on the floor in the living room. Amazing, because my sister and I assumed he didn't even get nude for a shower!

Cops investigated the house as for a homicide, interviewed the neighbors, etc. Mega-embarrassing. Especially since he was such a private person, Certificate-Of-Death "natural causes". What relief!

Best advice I can give you. My sister and I agreed we would not fight, but discuss without bad sentiment. We split everything 50/50, as there was no insurance. (BTW, my mother died 5 weeks prior to my dad).

We divvied up chores, who would take care of mail, notifying utilities, banks and so forth. Pennsylvania is a NIGHTMARE of rules, regulations, and taxes! We paid out a fortune. It's done, I can't cry over it.

The main thing is, my sister and I never came to harsh words with each other. We looked at the situ as a "Big Project", and agreed not to look at it as a "big picture", otherwise we'd go crazy try to take it all in at once.

Break your troubles into small tasks. Nothing is that "urgent". Better advice I can't give you. It worked for us.

Sincere condolences,

-Charlie- (PTCruiser51)
 
So sorry for you loss

Losing both your parents is one of those unfortunate milestones we face. In my own circumstance it was a big wake call to grow up. I miss both my parents everyday, at 57 I still wish I had them around to keep me on the right path.
 
Ben,

I am saddened to hear of your loss.  I note that you say that you will go it all alone - but I encourage you to look at all of the comments of support above and realize that your statement might not be totally correct.  You have something of an extended family here at AW.  Talk to us anytime it helps or anytime you need help.  We actually care about more than just automatic washers.

 

lawrence
 
Ben,

I have been there and done that Many times and its not nice. What I did was after any arrangements were finished is start to go thru everything and sort, especially what you want to keep for yourself and sentimental value, keeps your mind off it. I have one close niece left and thats about it.
Its sucks to loose someone so suddenly. My brother had a sudden heart attack on Veterans Day and I had to help my niece figure all the crap out, It Sucks! I feel your pain and hurt.

Tim
 
Thank you everyone

I love all of you for what you do for me during this difficult time. I just had pastor over for some spiritual uplifting and I've been on phone with co-workers, dad's friends, etc. While I realize that there is nothing anyone can do to make all the hurt, anger, and sorrow go away, just being able to talk to someone, anyone in fact, has been a blessing.

I have a request and I understand in advance if no one is comfortable with this. I don't have a premium account so I cannot receive PM but my email is in my profile. If anyone on here is willing, I sure would like your number so I can call if anything just to talk or perhaps for those who have "been there, done that", you might be able to offer up a perspective or some sage advice on how to cope with this.

I have vonage so LD calls are no cost to me. Again, I know this is an odd request but if you can be there for advice or just plain ole BS about stuff, I sure would appreciate it. LIke I said, I have not spoken to any relative on dad's side for 25+ years and on my mon's side............her sis in law is in Cyprus, 1 nephew is in Dubai, the other London, the other heck I don't know where (but I did speak to them even if they are half a world away). Just 9 days ago, my uncle passed on my mom's side after a lengthy stay in a hospital. His body simply fell apart. All this happened while my dad was up here on a visit no less! Talk about a double whammy.

Again, thanks to all for your help and advice. It means the world to me.
 
Hi, Ben...

 

So sorry for your loss--it was a huge one to have lost my mom, going on six-years-ago, and after my daughter had been born a year before...

 

May all of us folks here at AW, be the right comfort source--and others out there in person, too, that you can be with in this Bitter Now...

 

 

-- Dave
 
I am deeply and sincerely sorry

My Dad died of a heart attack in 1965, Ma faded away in early 2001. It is a club most of us join eventually. Remember the fun and love.

Lawrence/Maytagbesr
 
Ben,

So sorry to hear about the passing of your dad. Just take some comfort in knowing that according to what you've been told he passed from natural causes and didn't have a lengthy suffering.

My deepest sympathy and sincere condolences go out to you at this trying time.

May he R.I.P.

Rick (Washdaddy)
 


I'm vary sorry to hear this news. Its hard to deal with everything just stay strong and remember he wants the best for you. You will be in my prayers.

Anthony
 
Back
Top