I have this black little number in mind for the next convention.
True story:
My mother was sitting in church when her skirt flap opened more than she thought appropriate, so she attempted to close it. The little old yiayia (granny), head-to-toe in black with the schmata over her head, sitting next to her says
"Doll, since you've still got, it flaunt it. have no fear."
She nearly died on the spot.