That style of cylinder (oscillating) does not start by itself. It needs a push once the pressure builds up in the boiler. The stationary, dual action cylinders do not need to be pushed. They start on their own once the pressure is built up.
The reason big steam engines run slower than this model is because, well, they are big. It's the same reason why a little 1.2 liter 4 cylinder combustion engine seems to run faster than a big block V8.
On this particular model, there really is no speed regulator other than opening the whistle at the top to let off steam. The D16 has a steam regulator valve that serves as a throttle and controls the amount of steam going into the cylinder.
Lubrication, on this model, is done manually before the machine is fired up. All moving parts (cylinder, crank, flywheel) are oiled before each run. On more complex models, there are oil cups which use gravity or vacuum to move the oil to where it needs to be. This model will run about 15-20 minutes on a full boiler, so there isn't much danger of running it without lubrication.