Stupid joke

[jasonl]

I used to remember a calculator joke where you typed 58008 and upside down read "BOOBS" Then you tell this joke about Dolly Parton and add and subtract or multiply some numbers and the punchline is the number comes out 55378008 which reads BOOBLESS.

But damn it was so long ago I forgot the joke.

 

[Maytagmom]

Irishman

A married Irishman went into the confessional and said

to his priest, "I almost had an affair with another
woman."

The priest said, "What do you mean, almost?"

The Irishman said, "Well, we got undressed and rubbed
together, but then I stopped."

The priest said, "Rubbing together is the same as
putting it in. You're not to see that woman again. For

your penance, say five Hail Mary's and put $50 in the
poor box."

The Irishman left the confessional, said his prayers,
and then walked over to the poor box. He paused for a
moment and then started to leave.

The priest, who was watching, quickly ran over to him
saying, "I saw that. You didn't put any money in the
poor box!"

The Irishman replied, "Yeah, but I rubbed the $50 on
the box, and according to you, that's the same as
putting it in."

 

[mixfinder]

Dying

An Irishman says to his son, "I've just been to doctor and he says, I've but 2 weeks to live."
The father and son cry and hug and head to the pub.

The evening wears on and the Irishman stands and announces to the bar, "I've got AIDS and but two weeks to live."

The son pulls his father aside and says, "Father are ye so drunk ye forget ye have cancer?"

"No son, but I don't want me friends tryin to sleep with yer mother when I'm gone!" replies the Father.

 

[Washinsheen]

Question: "How do you get a nun pregnant?"

Answer: "Dress her up as an altar boy."

 

[Washinsheen]

A Blonde, Going on a Date.....

(hee-hee-hee!)

 

[toggleswitch]

Brokeback I

.

 

[toggleswitch]

Brokeback II

.

 

[toggleswitch]

.

 

[SactoTeddyBear]

Re: Polish Divorce:

POLISH DIVORCE:

A Polish man moved to the USA and married an American girl.

Although his English was far from perfect, they got along very well until one day he rushed into a lawyer's office and asked him if he could arrange a Divorce for him.

The lawyer said that getting a divorce would depend on the circumstances, and asked him the following questions:

Have you any grounds? Yes, an acre and half and nice little home.

No, I mean what is the foundation of this case? Its made of concrete.

I don't think you understand. Does either of you have a real grudge?

No, we have carport, and not need one.

I mean. What are your relations like?

All my relations still in Poland.

Is there any infidelity in your marriage?
We have hi-fidelity stereo and good DVD player.

Does your wife beat you up?
No, I'm always up before her.

Is your wife a nagger?
No, she white.

Why do you want this divorce?
She going to kill me.

What makes you think that?
I got proof.

What kind of proof?

She going to poison me.

She buy a bottle at drugstore and put on shelf in bathroom.

I can read, and it say: "Polish Remover".