Wacky mother-in-law ( in novel format)
Hey Jon speaking of getting creases while wearing..
My ex-mother-in-law (nicknamed "Mother Misery" by her own kid)
1) Would hang her DIRTY laundry on hangers (rather than use a hamper)so that it would not crease.
2) Would safety-pin the socks together BEFORE throwing them in the washer.
3) Learned how to use an automatic washer from her husband who literally had a third-grade education. To wit:
4)They would fill up the (T/L) machine with water, THEN add the clothes. ("Gee why is it overflowing?")
Emily, darling, what does the lid say? (it was a Sears with full instructons on the lid.. golden gobbler actually...)
Line #1 "Load clothes loosely in washer....
5) The machine was on a dolly (to get it to the sink) and would fly across the room upon spin portion of the cycle [They owned their own home by that time.] Changed two of four wheels to include a lock/brake.
6) When they lived in an apartment, renters were dissuaded from having a washer because neighbors "would get suds in their sinks" Solution? Use a tiny amiount that can not hold soil in suspension. In a nutshell, dirt form armpits and inseam areas was re-distributed to the rest of the load. The loads were grey and yellow and nasty! Didn't smell too good either.
Well she went out of town for a week:
1) I painted every room in the house to a color scheme I belied to be to her taste. (Had not been done in 12 years. When you cook with gas that is REAL nasty.) I got the colors right she finally said. (Didn't really G.A.S.)
2) Had a hole chopped in the wall to install a multi-room A/C.
3) De-cluttered all manner of junk hiding behind full-length curtains mounted three feet (a meter) from the wall. Also removed curtain rod to get rid of a S#$% hiding-place.
4) Got rid of 32 leaf & lawn bags of worthless papers hidden in single-car garage.
5) Put a goose-neck metal end over the drain hose of the washer to weigh-it down when it sat in the sink.
6) Washed everything with a pre-wash, main wash, and two rinses, and brought it all to the laundromat down the street to dry.
7) Threw out everything that was torn, rags, stained or age-inappropraite (e.g. tube-top on a 60+ y.o. woman who weighs as much as an 18-wheeler.) NO, SORRY GOTTA GO!
8) Bought two mirrored wardrobe closets and re-distributed the pack-rat's stuff.
..and after she cried, majorly, she got on her knees literally and thanked me.
BUT THE BEST IS "How did you get my clothes so clean and smelling so good (Taurus woman.. scent is everything) my response simply.... I USED SOAP!!!
She really did not believe me. So I said simply..they went to school for years to get the credentials to be able to create and manufacture a detergent and they say 1 cup (of powder) i sthe amoutn to use.. how did you decide 1/10th of a cup suffices? She laughed and got the point.
Craziness, grandma used to say, does not go to the mountains it goes to people.
