Jim, I am sorry for your great loss. Anyone who has been through this knows that you have done the most loving thing for your loved one. The thing that helps comfort and yet tortures me is that dogs are very tuned into our minds and the vibes we give off. They know what is coming as they head out the door for the last time, but they do not fight it because they know that the pain & illness is not going to end any other way. Still, there is nothing as awful as performing this last act for the one who has given you unconditional love, lain by your side when you were sick and who knew when you needed comforting.
There is an intersting book that was reviewed in the NYT a few weeks ago. It is written by a midwife who, on occasion, had communication from the baby before it was born. One of the most interesting things a baby communicated to her was that the family dog knew about the pregnancy from the first week, long before any of the people in the family, including the mother.
My father used to tell the story of one day when I was in my playpen in the unfenced back yard when we lived in Grand Ridge, IL. Laddie was in the yard near me. A neighbor, a kind, older, grandmotherly type who was a friend of the family walked into the yard, headed for my playpen. Very smoothly and so slowly as to look like a very natural thing, Laddie got up and strolled to my side of the playpen and just stood there, leaving just enough space so that the lady would not be able to touch me or pick me up. I was his to care for and he did not move until my mother came over to speak to the visitor. This is also the same gentle soul who put up with the chicks we got one year. We were away one Saturday and Laddie and the chicks were outside when a shower came up. We were worried all the way home, but when we arrived, there was Laddie lying in a sheltered place with the chicks peeking out from under his coat. He even cared for the kittens we had. How this much love resides in a creature is one of life's great mysteries and a key to understanding why we grieve their loss like that of other family members, more in some cases.