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toggleswitch

Well-known member
Platinum Member
Joined
Apr 12, 2005
Messages
19,053
Location
New York City, NY
Subject: marriage
> >
> >
> >
> >
> > You have two choices in life:
> >
> >
> > You can stay single and be miserable,
> >
> >
> > or get married and wish you were dead.
> >
> >
> > ====================================
> >
> >
> > At a cocktail party, one woman said to another,
> >
> >
> > "Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?"
> > "Yes, I am. I
> >
> >
> > married the wrong man."
> >
> >
> > ====================================
> >
> >
> > A lady inserted an ad in the classifieds:
> >
> >
> > "Husband Wanted"
> >
> >
> > Next day she received a hundred letters.
> >
> >
> > They all said the same thing:
> >
> >
> > "You can have mine."
> >
> >
> > ===================================
> >
> >
> > When a woman steals your husband, there is no better revenge
> > than to let
> >
> >
> > her keep him.
> >
> >
> > ====================================
> >
> >
> > A woman is incomplete until she is married. Then she is
> > finished.
> >
> >
> > =====================================
> >
> >
> > A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to
> > get
> >
> >
> > married?" Father replied, "I don't know, son, I'm still
> > paying."
> >
> >
> > =====================================
> >
> >
> > A young son asked, "Is it true, Dad, that in some parts of
> > Africa a man
> >
> >
> > doesn't know his wife until he marries her?" Dad replied, "That
> > happens in
> >
> >
> > every country, son."
> >
> >
> > ===================================
> >
> >
> > Then there was a woman who said,
> >
> >
> > "I never knew what real happiness was until I got married, and
> > by then, it
> >
> >
> > was too late."
> >
> >
> > ===================================
> >
> >
> > Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.
> >
> >
> > ===================================
> >
> >
> > If you want your spouse to listen and
> >
> >
> > pay strict attention to every word you say -- talk in your
> > sleep.
> >
> >
> > ====================================
> >
> >
> > Just think, if it wasn't for marriage, men would go through
> > life
> >
> >
> > thinking they had no faults at all.
> >
> >
> > =====================================
> >
> >
> > First guy says, "My wife's an angel!"
> >
> >
> > Second guy remarks, "You're lucky. Mine's still alive."
> >
> >
> > =====================================
> >
> >
> > A Woman's Prayer
> >
> >
> > Dear Lord, I pray for Wisdom, to understand a man , to love and
> > to
> >
> >
> > forgive him, and for Patience, for his moods. Because, Lord, if
> > I pray for
> >
> >
> > Strength, I'll just beat him to death.
>
>
>
>
 
Another one--

"Marriage is an institution
Love is blind
Marriage is love
Therefore, Marriage is an institution for the blind."

(I didn't make that one up folks. I'm here all week, tip your waitress, and do try the chicken. We call it veal!)

Lawrence/Maytagbear
 
Cracking me up again!

Ok all you Henny Youngmans....enough with the one liners already! LOL :-D

Marriage = Institution? Geez, no wonder I'm crazy! LOL
 
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